Chapter 3 - To Be Loved

And yet this woman has children to love her. She thinks she is in need of being loved; but what she really needs is to love. Being loved is the effect of loving. A loving man or woman can never want for love. Others turn to them in love as naturally as flowers turn to the sun.

In order to be loved you must radiate love. Instead of trying to attract the love of others, seek to give your love to others, expecting nothing in return. After a time you will find the unexpected coming to you spontaneously.

Learn to love by loving all people and things, and especially all things you find to do.

This same Caroline wants to "rise above drudgery." What is drudgery? It is simply unloved work--nothing more nor less. Any work which is looked down upon, and which is done with the hands whilst the heart and mind are criticizing it, and running out after other things,--any work thus done is drudgery. Work done with the hands and a small and unwilling part of the mind, is drudgery. To her who respects, and loves, and does with a will what she finds to do, there is no drudgery.

Let the woman who longs to be loved begin to love, by practicing on her work. To quit calling it "drudgery"; to put all her mind and will and soul into each piece of work as it comes; is the first and longest step toward loving it. It is an easily demonstrated fact that we learn to love anything we persist in doing with a whole-souled will.

To love our work enlarges our capacity for loving people, and the more we love people, and the more people we love, the more radiant we become.

It is the radiant lover whom all the world loves. Do you know that love and the lack of love are governed by "auto-suggestion"? It is natural to love, as every child does. But as we grow up we keep saying to ourselves (this is auto-suggestion, you know) that we "don't like this," and we "don't like that," until really we shut up our love and live in a continual state of "don't like"--a state which in due time develops into hate--hate for self as well as others. "Don't like" does it all.

Now cultivate love by auto-suggestion. Keep saying, "I like this," and "I like that." Hunt for things to like, and even tell yourself you like things when you don't feel that you like them at all.

Feeling is a result of suggestion. Nothing easier to prove than that. A hypnotist can, by suggestion, make you feel almost anything, whether it is true or not. He will say, "You feel sad," and straightway you will feel so. Then he will say, "You feel happy," and you do. Your feelings are like a harp, and your statements, or auto-suggestions, are the fingers which pick the strings. Take good care to play the tunes you want--to say you like things, or love them. Then you will quickly respond and feel that you like or love them. Keep practicing until you love all the time. Then you will be loved to your heart's content.