New Thought Library is an online public library with free eBook and audio downloads.
Links to downloads for Mince Pie by Christopher Morley are at the bottom of this web page
Blessings abound for the spiritually aware. Help connect like minded seekers with the Spiritual Resources produced by the NewThought.NET/work
"Unlike so many, we do not peddle the Divine word for profit."
~ 2 Corinthians 2:17
Serving New Thought is pleased to present
Mince Pie
"Evolution is better than Revolution. New Thought Library's New Thought Archives encompass a full range of New Thought from Abrahamic to Vedic. New Thought literature reflects the ongoing evolution of human thought. New Thought's unique inclusion of science, art and philosophy presents a dramatic contrast with the magical thinking of decadent religions that promulgate supersticions standing in the way of progress to shared peace and prosperity." ~ Avalon de Rossett
Contents - Instructions - On Filling an Ink Well - Old Thoughts for Christmas - Christmas Cards - On Unanswering Letters - A Letter to Father Time - What Men Live By - The Unnatural Naturalist - Sitting in the Barber's Chair - Brown Eyes and Equinoxes - 163 Innocent Old Men - A Tragic Smell in Marathon - Bullied by the Birds - A Message for Boonville - Making Marathon Safe for the Urchin - The Smell of Smells - A Japanese Bachelor - Two Days We Celebrate - The Urchin at the Zoo - Fellow Craftsmen - The Key Ring - "Owd Bob" - The Apple That No One Ate - As to Rumors - Our Mothers - Greeting to American Anglers - Mrs. Izaak Walton Writers a Letter to Her Mother - Truth - The Tragedy of Washington Square - If Mr. Wilson Were the Weather Man - The Truth at Last - Fixed Ideas - Trials of a President Travelling Abroad - Diary of a Publisher's Office Boy - The Dog's Commandments - The Value of Criticism - A Marriage Service for Commuters - The Sunny Side of Grub Street - Burial Service for a Newspaper Joke - Advice to Those Visiting a Baby - Abou Ben Woodrow - My Magnificent System - Letters to Cynthia: I. In Praise of Boobs - Letters to Cynthia: II. Simplification - To an Unknown Damsel - Thoughts on Setting an Alarm Clock - Songs in a Shower Bath - On Dedicating a New Teapot - The Unforgivable Syntax - Visiting Poets - A Good Home in the Suburbs - Walt Whitman Miniatures - On Doors -
The feminine language consists of words placed one after another with extreme rapidity, with intervals for matinees. The purpose of this language is (1) to conceal, and (2) to induce, thought. Very often, after the use of a deal of language, a thought will appear in the speaker's mind. This, while desirable, is by no means necessary.
THOUGHT cannot be defined, but it is instinctively recognized even by those unaccustomed to it.
PARTS OF SPEECH: There are five parts of feminine speech—noun, pronoun, adjective, verb and interjection.
THE NOUN is the name of something to wear, or somebody who furnishes something to wear, or a place where something is to be worn. E.g., hat, husband, opera. Feminine nouns are always singular.
THE PRONOUN is I.
ADJECTIVES: There are only four feminine adjectives—adorable, cute, sweet, horrid. These are all modified on occasion by the adverb perfectly.
THE VERBS are of two kinds—active and passive. Active verbs express action; passive verbs express passion. All feminine verbs are irregular and imperative.
INTERJECTIONS: There are two interjections—Heavens! and Gracious! The masculine language is much richer in interjections.
DECLENSION: There are three ways of feminine declining, (1) to say No; (2) to say Yes and mean No; (3) to say nothing.
CONJUGATION: This is what happens to a verb in the course of conversation or shopping. A verb begins the day quite innocently, as the verb go in the phrase to go to town. When it gets to the city this verb becomes look, as, for instance, to look at the shop windows. Thereafter its descent is rapid into the form purchase or charge. This conjugation is often assisted by the auxiliary expression a bargain. About the first of the following month the verb reappears in the masculine vocabulary in a parallel or perverted form, modified by an interjection.
CONVERSATION in the feminine language consists of language rapidly vibrating or oscillating between two persons. The object of any conversation is always accusative, e.g., "Mrs. Edwards has no taste in hats." Most conversations consist of an indeterminate number of sentences, but sometimes it is difficult to tell where one sentence ends and the next begins. It is even possible for two sentences to overlap. When this occurs the conversation is known as a dialogue. A sentence may be of any length, and is concluded only by the physiological necessity of taking breath.
SENTENCES: A sentence may be defined as a group of words, uttered in sequence, but without logical connection, to express an opinion or an emotion. A number of sentences if emitted without interruption becomes a conversation. A conversation prolonged over an hour or more becomes a gossip. A gossip, when shared by several persons, is known as a secret. A secret is anything known by a large and constantly increasing number of persons.
LETTERS: The feminine language, when committed to paper, with a stub pen and backhanded chirography, is known as a letter. A letter should if possible, be written on rose or lemon colored paper of a rough and flannely texture, with scalloped edges and initials embossed in gilt. It should be written with great rapidity, containing not less than ten exclamation points per page and three underlined adjectives per paragraph. The verb may be reserved until the postscript.
Generally speaking, students of the feminine language are agreed that rules of grammar and syntax are subject to individual caprice and whim, and it is very difficult to lay down fixed canons. The extreme rapidity with which the language is used and the charm and personal magnetism of its users have disconcerted even the most careful and scientific observers. A glossary of technical terms and idioms in the feminine language would be a work of great value to the whole husband world, but it is doubtful if any such volume will ever be published.
PREVIOUS PAGE - 30 - NEXT PAGE
Links to Additional Media for Mince Pie by Christopher Morley such as audio and ebooks are located at the bottom of this web page.
Discover a rainbow of exciting New Thought Communities around the corner and around the globe.
Find FellowshipDaily Wisdom from today's New Thought Leaders supports your Spiritual Journey with insights and affirmations.
Daily WisdomInterviews with New Thought Sharers around the world & explorations of current themes in New Thought
New Thought Talks
We give you a powerful platform upon which to do God's Work learning and sharing New Thought:
DivineJournal.com, NewThoughtCommunity.com, NewThoughtTao.com and many more ...
Use DivineJournal.com to Research, read & write New Thought Texts which you can share through NewThoughtBook.info.
New Thought Resources accessible to anyone in the world with an internet connection.
Find New Thought Communities around the corner & around the world.
FindACenter.com, NewThoughtCentres.com, NewThoughtCenters.com
Celebrating New Thought Diversity in thought and form, we weather all storms, thrive and prosper! NewThoughtDay.com, NewThoughtWeek.com
Listen to New Thought Radio broadcasts from the New Thought Streams PodCast Archive, along with a growing collection of New Thought Music directly from New Thought Artists around the world.
Listen to New Thought Radio 24/7/365"'The truth, once announced, has the power not only to renew but to extend itself. New Thought is universal in its ideals and therefore should be universal in its appeal. Under the guidance of the spirit, it should grow in good works until it embraces many lands and eventually the whole world.' ~ James A. Edgerton, New Thought Day, August 23rd, 1915."
New Thought Holidays August 23rdExplore the New Thought Tao and discover deeper wisdom. New Thought has many forms, Taoist New Thought brings insights to the table that are not so apparent in Abrahamic forms. While many Abrahamics fight to impose their views on the rest of the world. Taoist New Thought teaches the way of acceptance and understanding. Principles in the New Thought Tao provide powerful processes which serve as keys to deeper happiness and inner peace from the inside out.
Read Divine Tao #8 "Water" Tao #8New Thought conferences from various New Thought denominations and organizations are happening all ove rthe world. Whether Old New Thought or New Thought Today, find conference info about New Thought Conferences!.
New Thought Conferences ShareNew Thought Solutions for New Thought Sharers and New Thought Communities. Empowerment programs that awaken us to the co-creative "Power of We." Grow and thrive sharing a rainbow of New Thought wisdom with the world.
New Thought Solutions Thrive!A growing collection of New Thought books from Today's New Thought Leaders. Many New Thought books lack the marketing necessary to get them in front of you, with New Thought Books INFO those writers to find you and you to find those writers...
New Thought Books Read!